Wednesday 25 August 2010

My second application for a job as a Homeopath


A significantly higher than normal number of people appear to have read my previous application to be a homeopath. So thanks for that.

I was one of several scientists/skeptics who applied for the position, so competition is stiff. However, it appears that the potential employee, NHS Tayside, has tried to deal with this abundance of pseudo-applicants by effectively moving the goalposts, so to speak.

It appears that most, if not all of those who applied have been sent a hard-copy (known in the old days as 'paper', I believe) set of forms to apply for the position in response to our 'expression of interest in the position'. An understandable strategy, maybe? I don't think they can legally just throw applications in the bin, for all that they're blatantly cynical efforts to ridicule an institution for wasting ever decreasing public funds. This way, they allow all the 'applicants' to pursue their application further should they wish to do so, while (probably correctly) assuming that those just taking the piss won't have the time or inclination to go through all the forms.

And, quite tellingly, have removed the 'statement in support of application' section which provided the bulk of the mirth and scorn in the blogosphere

However, they underestimate how unemployed I am, and the fact that, unlike most skeptics, my background has given me extensive experience with pushing a joke to breaking point and beyond. So here, for your perusal, are the forms I have sent back to NHS Tayside.

(N.B. My handwriting is, undeniably, shocking. This is true of all doctors, we actually have to undergo an intense 3-month penmanship disruption course before we're even eligible to submit a thesis or sit a final exam)







They also requested 4 copies of my CV. Being a job vacancy for a homeopath, I realised that a comprehensive summary of my scientific credentials would, if anything, work against me. I have also filled in a number of job applications recently, so have received all the regular advice about CVs. The main recommendations is that they be eye-catching, concise, clear and memorable. As a result, my CV is rendered largely in cartoon form.

(N.B. As it turns out, my drawing skills are even worse than my handwriting. This may be due to the aforementioned handwriting disruption course, or my scientist's subconscious mind resisting any attempt I make to engage in a form of 'art'. You choose)



Also, they asked for a copy of my passport.


So there you go. If I hear anything back form them, I'll post it here asap

Dean

e-mail: Humourology@live.co.uk
twitter: @garwboy


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8 comments:

JadedGreenEyes said...

Absolutely brilliant!

Anonymous said...

Fantastic - must get mine sent off...

Anonymous said...

You really do have too much time. But you spend it well :)

Paul Blanchard said...

I must say, I'm enjoying following your progress. Much as it would shake what I have left of my faith in the NHS, I kinda hope you get the job...

Stephen Machan said...

Great last two posts, I feel like your creating more competition for yourself though.

redcathy said...

I haven't laughed so much in a long time, and it's good to be laughing at something that is on the side of good. I think the cartoon CV thing might catch on though, it's Personally I am hoping the person who gets the job gets 68p and a bucket of water.

Anonymous said...

I also like the idea of cartoon CSVs. This was excellent, and you are now a new favorite of mine on the interwebs. I was surprised to hear you had schools (and even colleges) in Wales. It was my understanding that the Welsh were only meant to be quaint, so I guess I learned something here.

Bodach

dave lambert said...

Thanks you've made me giggle on a boring Friday afternoon

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